Ark Update and Official Log: Day 33

Thankfully, the mood on board has lifted a bit. Most have accepted that we can only wait out the storm and then rebuild after. Some are taking it worse than others, but we are pulling together and will get through.

Other developments and updates:

  • The last hold out in the “I would never eat a rat” competition finally did. Angus from Deck 32 is the winner of the pool, and gets an extra serving of rice.
  • Cheese is no longer allowed anywhere below Deck 10.
  • Decks 35 to 42 have seceded from the ark and formed their own country. The security crew have decided to wait them out. There are no bathrooms on decks 35 to 42.
  • Deck 17’s “Kung Pao Luau” was quite successful, although there was some damage from the bonfire. We’ve agreed that future Luau’s will be announced to the crew in advance, and held on the outside decks.
  • We also agreed to only eat spare animals next time, although the mammoth steaks will last quite a while. Predictably, the Future Cannibals of Ameriark Association have disbanded, so that issue was resolved without conflict.
  • The Future Historical Philosophers Union has changed their name again to the Democratic People’s Union of the Future Historical Philosophers and Professors Organization, LLC.
  • We now have 424 rabbits and 693 rodents, and many more of the crew understand why I call all rodents tribbles, and wanted them in individual cages.
  • There have been some arguments about why we needed to bring 2 of each kind of tiger. A compromise was reached to put them closer to the rabbits to ease tensions.
  • Submissions for the “What did it feel like to be dry” essay contest have been robust, but most are grammatically poor at best. Writing classes start next week.
  • The Pessimist Club voted to change their name to Smuge Geniuses Guild and are having their weekly rush party on Monday.
  • There is still no suspect in the Lizarding Events on Deck 9, so investigators are expanding the investigation beyond the Reptile Enthusiast Club’s members.
  • All our stored raisins have re-plumped. We are planning a wine tasting as soon as possible.
  • No one can agree on what a cubit is yet. Meetings will still be held on Tuesdays, but will be moved to the deck 15 cubits above waterline until situation is resolved. See you there. 😉
  • We’ve determined that it takes on average 12 cow-a-bungie drops to break a rope. Additional cow-a-bungie events have been halted until we can ensure the safety of the cows and jockeys.
  • The Ewe Are So Beautiful competition on Deck 47 is taking entries now. Submit the name of your favorite sheep before Friday. It is suggested to submit unsigned nominations.

Generally, things are going ok. There are still complaints and issues, but we are managing to keep things civil. While life on board can be challenging, we all realize that we are in this together, and as illustrated by Mr. Fitzgerald, those who feel otherwise are welcome to find their own accommodations. Related: the recall election for Ark Captain has lost momentum and has been postponed.