Resolutions 2010: Redux

This should be easy. A new year, revising goals, a simple plan to go forward. So why does this sit in draft for so long? My first few drafts started off as blah blah blah, resolutions again, blah blah, pain in the ass, blah blah, reasons, or none, why does it matter.

That’s not the way this is supposed to feel. This should be hopeful. A new year, new steps towards something. Batteries recharged and ready to go. Something inspiring that puts heat under the griddle. Wait a minute. Spark, recharging, inspiration. Where is that for me? What brings that energy? Right now, I have no idea. I look at my review post from last year and can’t find that spark, either. All the places that I fell short show the same thing. Just didn’t get the gumption up to get it done, and more surprisingly to me, I’m not too pissed about it. Ah, hold on there, cowboy. It seems the sparks are there, but keeping them going and moving has been the weak point. Putting energy into that spark to feed it. Now that I think back, this is important.

This year I need to figure out how to get recharged. Find an input of energy to replace what goes out. (Disclaimer: I am extremely lucky and very fortunate and thankful. I’m not complaining, I just need to figure this out. Just because my life isn’t a horror show that would make a movie of the week script doesn’t mean I can’t get depressed.) My son is at the age where he wants all my time and energy. I can’t deny that. In a few years, he probably won’t even want to hang out with me. My wife is doing great things with her full time career and her second and third part-time careers, and I fully support those too. I miss her, but I want her to find her happiness. The dog is a year old and wants to play with me as soon as I get home from work until he passes out. He spends 3 days all alone all day every week. Then there’s all the other stuff like PTA that has been a minimal return task since 1897 when it was created. Work has fallen into a minimal return state. Extended family: energy vampires. So all this pulls and pulls and pulls out energy, but where does it come back? What fills the reservoir back up? You know what I’m talking about. You’ve been there, too. We all get there. I’ve been here too long. Way too long.

So enough of the woe is me bullshit. This year, the one goal is to find out how to recharge my batteries. If I can do that, I’ll improve the rest of my life, and then I can really give something special to the people around me. See? You can benefit from this, too. It’s a win-win.

Towards this one goal, I’m going to try lots of different stuff.

  1. Re-ignite date night with Aimee – we need to get back to having recharge time together.
  2. Be the role model for Declan.
  3. Exercise twice a week – This is supposedly good for depression.
  4. Write or draw 3 times a week – I like to do it, so I should. Do it with the goal of doing it well. You may be exposed to some of this.
  5. Train Poe better – When he is comfortable, he is much less demanding, and he’ll be able to come out more, keeping him happy. Cycle of joy.
  6. Finish JoyTo.Us and – I’ve been letting my part drag too long. Just finish it.
  7. Learn AS3, CSS, 3D, Unity and all that work stuff. Learn it well so that I am proud of what I do, not so it is just good enough.
  8. Avoid the stuff that annoys me. Politics, sorry. You waste my time. I’ll pay attention and vote, but I don’t want to talk about you any more. You attract uninformed morons. Entertainment gossip. You suck. Go film yourself. News in general, I am giving you notice. More often that not, you are useless and irrelevant. I don’t need that.
  9. Find more people that inspire. Hunt them down. Work to be worthy to hang out nearby. Then take that inspiration and pass it along. Inspire others.
  10. Travel. Travel. Travel. See other places. Go camping. Weekend getaways with the family. Overnights to anywhere. Just go. And travel light.
  11. Get more inputs – Movies, art galleries, books, stuff that makes me think. Search through Facebook, Twitter, and friends to find the good information, and ditch the stuff that just sucks time.
  12. Find good music. Search it out. It makes me happy. When Indie 101.5 was running, life was better. Find that source again, and be willing to pay for it. Support the artists that provide it.
  13. Create a cycle. Take inputs, filter them, and push it back out as something. Anything. I am not stagnant pool. Let things flow through.

So that’s the plan. I’m hopeful.

If you’ve read this far, let me know what you think. Change is in the air, and it smells funny.